On my way to Bahadurpally...a distant place where my work place resides..
In a APSRTC bus....that can put any high decibel sound making factory to shame...
Sitting besides a guy ..maybe in 20's... definitely an engineering student(most of the young boys and girls with bags end up as an engineering student in AP)
The guy was looking out of the window and his mobile was loudly playing "to phir aao from Awarapan' in a speaker mode...
This was kind of strange and exciting for me...a Telugu guy listening to a Bollywood film song...i never had this experience before....earlier this i was always under the impression that they are totally mad about their music...
With anxiety hitting my mind,i dared to pull off an abstract conversation with him...
Here it goes:-
Me-do you know the meaning of this song?
Guy-No
Me-still you are listening it..?
Guy-Yes...i like the tune of it...it makes me sad..!
Me-why you want to be sad when everyone searches for happiness?
Guy-I am not sure about that...it's just the way i am...i like being sad!
Me-No..i dont buy that...there has to be some story behind..no body likes being sad!
Guy-no story...i am more comfortable that way because every time i am happy,a fear struck me that this happiness is just temporary phase and it can fade away in a moment.
Me-and so can be said about sadness....both are just two sides of a coin..
Guy-yeah but i think when you are sad,you are much more true to your soul.
Me-and is it necesasry ...like to be true to ur soul?
Guy-i guess...it is...it always helps in simplyfing life!
Me-simplifying life???what does that mean?
Guy-it means you can always look for options when nothing seems to work your way...
Me-so you mean to say that we have to be sad to look out for options in life?
Guy-not exactly...it's just my personal opinion that happiness makes you shallow but when you are sad you go deep down the sea and search for what lies beneath the whole emotional circus...
Me-hmmm....what's ur age?
Guy-i am 20..
Me-you are way too young to talk all this intellectual stuff...you should be hooking with girls,partying and having a good time in life..
Guy-yeah right...hooking up with girls...!
Me-what's with the look..?
Guy-that is the only reason that makes me talk like that..
Me-oh ok...so here we are...i found the background story then...You are just another case of a failure in love...aren't you??
Guy-i never failed....it's just that she never entered the examination hall...
Me-hehehe....sorry about that...but that sounded funnny...what happned?she didn't liked you?
Guy-she did...but not as much ...
Me-okay so she typecasted u as just another friend?
Guy-hmmm...maybe....she had a firm belief that we can never have that "love equation"...her faith in me was shred into pieces when i confronted her about my feelings..
Me-so then she parted ways with you..
Guy-yes...that was the last day i saw her... after that it was just her thoughts that rambled in my mind...nothing more..
Me-do you still love her?
Guy-I am not sure about that....it's just that i wanna lead a normal life now..
Me-a normal "sad" life???isn't it?
Guy-yeah...
Me-but that doesn't answer my question...do you still love her?
Guy-and why would i tell you this?
Me-already you have told me enough buddy...i deserve to know this now...don't you think?
Guy-I don't want to think about her...
Me-Okay...tell me one thing what will you do if she comes back in your life and love you the same way as you do her...
Guy-No i won't let that happen now...because if she will come back in my life,she will take the sadness away from me...and i am not comfortable being happy anymore..
Me-oh...that was too heavy thing to say...You seriously need to break free my friend...
Guy-break free???what do you mean by that?
Me-It means getting a grip of freedom from all of your self created inhibitions...try it sometimes...it will make you feel alive again...
Guy-but i am not dead..
Me-yes ofcourse you are not...but somewhere you need to join the missing dots of your life...
Guy-fine...i will try to break free..
Me-good to hear that...
Guy-what about you?it was more of a interview than a conversation.I never got a chance to peek into pages of life's story.
Me-my stop is here ....i need to get down...
Guy-hey..dat's not fair...atleast tell did u had ur chances in love?u seems to be a happy go lucky guy...i bet you must had a smooth ride...
Me-yeah smooth as the roads of AP during rainy season...
(I saw him laughing first time in the whole conversation.It made me feel kind of victorious.)
Me-Okay...it was nice talking to you.Have a "happy" life ahead!
Guy-happy?? will this word ever blend with me..
Me-i am sure it will....it blends perfectly with life and you are one of its own..
Guy-okay...as you say so...
Me-goodbye for now...hope some day again we will meet and continue where we left..
Guy-sure...I will wait for that day to come..
Me-till then rabraakha
Guy-what was that?
Me-Rabraakha-it means May God take care of you...!
Guy-same to you...
Me-No i want you to say that word..
Guy-Okay i will try,...Rabraakkha!
Me-yeah that's the way it is.Rabraakha!
