Sunday, September 16, 2012

To Each His Own..

Fire in,Fire out,
withering dreams was it all about?

followed me you,till the dungeons,
watched me you,till the realms of vengeance,

all was what i asked was this,
through my veins,your name shall be a bliss,

in the form of a letter,it crashed on my soul,
was it my fault or was it just another of your's unlucky black mole.

Fire in,Fire out...



Friday, September 14, 2012

Thursday, September 6, 2012

The Perfect Shot

The rugged wall clock showed 02:02 am....the dawn was about to touch us but we were still not done with the night....
The Lake view resort was buzzing with silence throughout.Only the sound of water can be heard and that water belonged to the lake Naini-the mango shaped Heart of Nainital.
In the room 103,two empty glasses were kept beautifully on a glass table besides a bottle of Scotch.Ofcourse Unintentionally.
Every piece of the 'tikkas' and peanuts were comfortably allocated in the empty spaces of stomach.All that was left were some silver paper plates and red chilly sauce that can keep one on toes in the entire morning.
The Florescent  light was making its presence felt by striking on the aviators kept on the wooden cupboard and the small ancient  chandelier was in full mood to fall right over us.

Kay's eyes were half closed.He seems to be knocked out but I am sure sleep won't catch him so easily.Soon the king will be up and get engaged in some sweet conversations with one of his damsels who must be by now all fired up.

I made myself the last drink of the night,took the packet of cigarettes & lighter(was not sure if i am gonna smoke but sometimes just to wake up my creative spirits,I need those white pipes) and with utmost care, picked up my baby SLR.I think i whispered to him"let's create some magic..."..Not sure though and i walked out of the room...I loved the sound my feet made when i walked on the wooden floor.It gave me an impression that as if i am transported to some different world and live in a tree house.I so wish to do that one day.
Just outside our wooden room ,there was a common bay area.Two chairs and a table were placed perfectly in the middle.A board hanging on the wall welcomed me by saying "No drinking & No Smoking'.I closely saw my glass and it saw me back.If i remember clearly,it winked and grinned at me.

In the quest of my perfect shot,i hurriedly put my glass on the table,removed the cap of my camera and opened the window. As soon as I did that,I was greeted with soft cool breeze hitting peacefully my face and my eyes witnessed a scene that i am dead sure ,words will fall flat in describing it.But still if i dare to try...it was like Mother nature was all dressed up for some heavenly occasion.With the full moon shining on her forehead and the black clouds were giving a perfect impression of those shiny locks. The water underneath was slow and steady making some enticing sounds.All the trees around were dancing beautifully to the tunes of the water.The lake had amazingly captivated the aura of the moon and embraced it as if it belonged to her. I was taken aback as being a big city slicker this was all unreal for me .God's brush just created a masterpiece.
Without losing any time i quickly adjusted my camera and started clicking some random shots.I knew this is the moment when i am gonna get my best shot till date.Everything is in place...great set up,high spirits and no one to bother me.
But it wasn't so easy.I checked in the camera monitor and  found every shot a mere ordinary one.Not even closest to my expectations.My SLR actually failed to capture the beauty of that eternal moment.I tried again with some different settings but all in vain.Nothing better.
I was frustrated to the core.I put back the camera on the table,sipped my drink and lighted up a cigarette.I closed my eyes for a moment and again stared back at the lake.Few moments passed by and then suddenly i realized the whole reason of me being there.

My perfect shot was right there in front of my eyes,its just that i needed to have a deeper look...penetrating into all of the self created boundaries.
That shot was all reserved for me.It doesn't deserved to be captured in any digital medium.It has to be set free.I have to give it the wings of imagination so that it can fly higher & higher in the skies of my memory.
My eyes refused to blink and my heart skipped a beat or two.
It was all there.Nothing else needed,Nothing else mattered...

I saw my childhood drawings on the surface of water....I felt my parents blessings with each blows of the wind....I sensed my friends joys and sorrows hidden all over the valley....I heard her enchanting voice softly blending with the sounds of lake....I faced all those unanswered questions of my life blinking in the sky...I witnessed few of my buried regrets walking down the lonely road and somewhere also i saw my future clinging to one of the branches of the dancing trees waiting for me with arms wide open.

It was a rare defining moment and a perfect one.I was glad that i was here,I was happy that lake Naini chosed me to be part of her adventure that night.
Just to pay my last respect,I spilled my rest of the drink outside the window.It gave me a sense of fulfillment that i shared my last drink with the lake naini and her party.It felt like being in a state of ecstasy.I took a deep breath and made a promise to myself and the lake...that one day i will be back again but with next time i will surely have the answers to some of the questions of my life.

Now it was time to get back to reality so as i was about to end up my priceless experience and close the window,i saw a man walking down the steep street beneath.He seems to be in a very jovial mood. He was listening to some local music on his radio.I couldn't make out the meaning of  the words but the tune was mesmerizing.He waved me....and i waved him back with a smile on my face. That's what i love the most about all the small towns of India.All you need is a smile on your face and every one will treat you as if you were part of that place since the dawn of the time.I thank him for giving me that music in my mind that actually concluded the whole scene in a cinematic fashion..

After discovering the contentment,I reached back my room and surprisingly found,Kay snoring loudly with his Iphone still on his ears.I freed him  from his I'devil ,gave him a blanket and switched off the lights.While i also prepared myself to surrender to some sound sleep.

I gently closed my eyes and guess what...The Perfect Shot was all i can see.


Au Revoir...

Saturday, April 28, 2012

A Sublime Conversation....


On my way to Bahadurpally...a distant place where my work place resides..


In a APSRTC bus....that can put any high decibel sound making factory to shame...


Sitting besides a guy ..maybe in 20's... definitely an engineering student(most of the young boys and girls  with bags end up as an engineering student in AP)


The guy was looking out of the window and his mobile was loudly playing "to phir aao from Awarapan' in a speaker mode...
This was kind of strange and exciting for me...a Telugu guy listening to a Bollywood film song...i never had this experience before....earlier this i was always under the impression that they are totally mad about their music...


With anxiety hitting my mind,i dared to pull off an abstract conversation with him...
Here it goes:-


Me-do you know the meaning of this song?


Guy-No


Me-still you are listening it..?


Guy-Yes...i like the tune of it...it makes me sad..!


Me-why you want to be sad when everyone searches for happiness?


Guy-I am not sure about that...it's just the way i am...i like being sad!


Me-No..i dont buy that...there has to be some story behind..no body likes being sad!


Guy-no story...i am more comfortable that way because every time i am happy,a fear struck me that this happiness is just temporary phase and it can fade away in a moment.


Me-and so can be said about sadness....both are just two sides of a coin..


Guy-yeah but i think when you are sad,you are much more true to your soul.


Me-and is it necesasry ...like to be true to ur soul?


Guy-i guess...it is...it always helps in simplyfing life!


Me-simplifying life???what does that mean?


Guy-it means you can always look for options when nothing seems to work  your way...


Me-so you mean to say that we have to be sad to look out for options in life?


Guy-not exactly...it's just my personal opinion that happiness makes you shallow but when you are sad you go deep down the sea and search for what lies beneath the whole emotional circus...


Me-hmmm....what's ur age?


Guy-i am 20..


Me-you are way too young to talk all this intellectual stuff...you should be hooking  with girls,partying and having a good time in life..


Guy-yeah right...hooking up with girls...!


Me-what's with the look..?


Guy-that is the only reason that makes me talk like that..


Me-oh ok...so here we are...i found the background story then...You are just another case of a failure in love...aren't you??


Guy-i never failed....it's just that she never entered the examination hall...


Me-hehehe....sorry about that...but that sounded funnny...what happned?she didn't liked you?


Guy-she did...but not as much ...


Me-okay so she typecasted u as just another friend?


Guy-hmmm...maybe....she had a firm belief that we can never have that "love equation"...her faith in me was shred into pieces when i confronted her about my feelings..


Me-so then she parted ways with you..


Guy-yes...that was the last day i saw her... after that it was just her thoughts that rambled in my mind...nothing more..


Me-do you still love her?


Guy-I am not sure about that....it's just that i wanna lead a normal life now..


Me-a normal "sad" life???isn't it?


Guy-yeah...


Me-but that doesn't answer my question...do you still love her?


Guy-and why would i tell you this?


Me-already you have told me enough buddy...i deserve to know this now...don't you think?


Guy-I don't want to think about her...


Me-Okay...tell me one thing what will you do if she comes back in your life and love you the same way as you do her...


Guy-No i won't let that happen now...because if she will come back in my life,she will take the sadness away from me...and i am not comfortable being happy anymore..


Me-oh...that was too heavy thing to say...You seriously need to break free my friend...


Guy-break free???what do you mean by that?


Me-It means getting a grip of freedom from all of your self created inhibitions...try it sometimes...it will make you feel alive again...


Guy-but i am not dead..


Me-yes ofcourse you are not...but somewhere you need to join the missing dots of your life...


Guy-fine...i will try to break free..


Me-good to hear that...


Guy-what about you?it was more of a interview than a conversation.I never got a chance to peek into pages of life's story.


Me-my stop is here ....i need to get down...


Guy-hey..dat's not fair...atleast tell did u had ur chances in love?u seems to be a happy go lucky guy...i bet you must had a smooth ride...


Me-yeah smooth as the roads of AP during rainy season...


(I saw him laughing first time in the whole conversation.It made me feel kind of victorious.)


Me-Okay...it was nice talking to you.Have a "happy" life ahead!


Guy-happy?? will this word ever blend with me..


Me-i am sure it will....it blends perfectly with life and you are one of its own..


Guy-okay...as you say so...


Me-goodbye for now...hope some day again we will meet and continue where we left..


Guy-sure...I will wait for that day to come..


Me-till then rabraakha


Guy-what was that?


Me-Rabraakha-it means May God take care of you...!


Guy-same to you...


Me-No i want you to say that word..


Guy-Okay i will try,...Rabraakkha!


Me-yeah that's the way it is.Rabraakha!